Closure

I’m trying to come to terms with this.

The fact that I will never be able to fully get over you.

That you will still cross my mind, even though I do my best not to think about you anymore.

I hate how I am still here questioning so many of the things you have done and wondering if you ever actually told me the truth.

I hate doubting the one and only person I felt I could go to for anything.

I’m stuck here feeling sick to my stomach at times, realizing just how much I cared for you and was willing to give up for you.

I would have done ANYTHING for you.

I don’t want to be angry with you anymore, but my heart keeps reminding my mind that you of all people broke me, broke me worse than my dad ever has.

I feel so betrayed and lied to, I just want to get over it!

BUT I CAN’T, BECAUSE FOR SOME DAMN REASON… I CAN’T GET OVER HOW FUCKING QUICKLY YOU WENT BACK TO HER, BECAUSE OF HOW MUCH IT PISSES ME OFF THAT YOU LIED TO ME AND TRIED TO HIDE IT FROM ME.

But most of all, it just hurts… that you trust her more than me, that now you have shut me out… permanently, who knows maybe that’s for the best.

All I know is that I’m done, I AM SO DONE.

I am saying goodbye, because you will never read this, and i will never get closure.